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Razor Mountain Development Journal #33

This is part of my ongoing series where I’m documenting the development of my serial novel, Razor Mountain. Be forewarned, there are spoilers ahead! You can start from the beginning here.

Last Time

I updated two more chapter summaries — 29 and 30 — and looked for potential plot holes that might trip me up.

Chapter 31

God-Speaker tours Cain’s latest project, a new geothermal borehole that provides more heat and energy for the city. God-Speaker suggests they put more resources behind it, and move up the project timeline. Cain apologizes for overstepping his bounds in their previous meeting. God-Speaker realizes that the man isn’t a threat, just passionate about his projects. God-Speaker advises him to focus on projects with the most impact, and avoid getting distracted doing too many things at once.

God-Speaker returns to his office and calls in Reed. He asks for a report on Cain, but Reed has nothing of interest to report. God-Speaker tells him to call off the surveillance and go back to focusing on his regular tasks. He notes (without much interest) that Reed’s projects have recently fallen behind while he’s distracted with this extra task.

Reed unexpectedly attacks him with a knife. God-Speaker is injured and taken completely by surprise. He fights Reed off and flees to the chamber of the artifacts. Reed catches him there, and he frantically sends his fading consciousness into a random person: baby Christopher.

Cliffhangers:

  • Does he “survive”? (I think it should be unclear whether he succeeds in sending out his consciousness, and not clear that he’s gone into baby Christopher.)

Mysteries:

  • 31.1 – Why did Reed betray him?
  • 31.2 – What happens to God-Speaker?
  • 31.3 – What happens to Razor Mountain with God-Speaker dead?

Episode Arc:

  • God-Speaker is mildly pleased to discover that Cain really isn’t a threat, and may be a useful person to mentor. He is distracted, and completely blindsided by Reed’s attack. He is used to being in control, and can barely believe that he might die from this danger that he completely overlooked. It is in this state of disarray that he sends out his consciousness in a last-ditch attempt to survive.

Notes:

  • Once Reed attacks, this should feel like horror. God-Speaker is hurt, trying to get away. Reed appears emotionless, following slowly and steadily to finish the job. Maybe even play into it a little with something like the doors to the artifact chamber closing, only to have Reed’s hand come through, blocking them as he forces his way in.

Chapter 32

Christopher is still confined, but comfortable. He wonders if being trapped here is any better than being trapped in the bunker. He decides it is, because he has the hope of being able to improve his situation. He also realizes that being around people, even if he can’t interact much, makes a difference in his mental state. He also knows now that he can adapt to a lot more than he would have believed before this ordeal started.

Gabby visits him for the first time in several days. He asks why she hasn’t been interviewing him anymore. He wonders if he’s stuck in administrative limbo. She explains that it took some time for his case to work its way up through her superiors. Sgt. Meadows, Christopher’s former interrogator, has also been fighting every step of the way, making his own unsubstantiated claims about Christopher. Gabby clearly considers him slightly deranged.

Gabby takes Christopher out into the city. She explains that once her report reached a certain level, there was suddenly a great deal of interest in him. Now, he’s going to be moved yet again. He’s out of her hands.

He asks if this means he’ll have any more freedom or opportunity to leave. She doesn’t have that information, but she was allowed to escort him, rather than armed soldiers, so that’s probably a good sign.

She takes him through the facility to an elevator. They go up. At the top, she hands him off to a pair of silent soldiers and wishes him luck. They escort him to an empty room and leave him alone. A camera in the corner watches him. He is reminded uncomfortably of his arrival at the facility, and how he was treated.

Then, a hidden door in the wall opens, letting him into a hallway (the inner council’s private facilities). There, he is greeted by Cain (now old), who tells him, “Welcome home.”

Cliffhangers:

  • What does Cain want with Christopher?

Mysteries:

  • 32.1 – How does Cain know him? Is Christopher actually God-Speaker?

Episode Arc:

  • Christopher is physically comfortable, really for the first time since being in the bunker. He’s still dissatisfied with his life being largely out of his control, but determined to make the most of what control he does have. Immediately, the ground shifts under him again, and he’s brought to Cain, whose greeting tells him that once again, he has no idea what’s going on.

Notes:

  • This is the moment when the story starts to “wrap around,” introducing a character from God-Speaker’s story into Christopher’s. Some readers will realize at this point that Christopher is God-Speaker in some form or another.
  • This is the end of Act II. Everything should be pushing toward the ending from here.

Finding Christopher

I’m typically a character-oriented writer, but Razor Mountain is built around plot. This particular story evolved from my ideas about structure and making a “mystery box” story that leaves the audience satisfied instead of irritated. Christopher is thrown into bizarre circumstances that he doesn’t understand. He does have agency, and his decisions matter, but I still don’t feel like I have as good a grasp on his character as I’d like.

Christopher starts as someone who’s afraid of taking chances. This mirrors God-Speaker, who progressively becomes this immortal who needs to completely control his surroundings due to his utter fear of facing death. Christopher’s arc involves becoming less afraid, partly because he’s thrust into danger and confusion, and partly because he chooses to move forward into uncertainty rather than move back into stagnant safety. Christopher has to be the one who ultimately overcomes the fear of death, because God-Speaker isn’t able to.

Christopher has backstory. His fears stem from the childhood trauma of losing his brother. He carries guilt, though it wasn’t really his fault, and this is compounded by the way his parents treat him, as they are afraid of losing their only remaining child.

All of that is useful, but a bit cold and clinical. What I’m trying to find is Christopher’s voice. He should be likeable, and while this background might add up to sympathy from the reader, I don’t think it gets to likeability. I think humor may be the key to a likeable Christopher.

I don’t see Christopher as a sarcastic person. God-Speaker is self-important enough that he might go for a bit of sarcastic or even mean humor at someone else’s expense. Christopher is much more likely to be self-effacing, and to use humor as a defense mechanism or a way to process being way over his head in an unexpected situation. He’s the sort of person who might lead with a joke about the situation when meeting someone for the first time.

I’ve never really figured out how to work humor into an outline. For me, it feels like something that has to happen organically as I’m working on description or dialogue. However, I think having an idea of Christopher’s sense of humor can at least point me in the direction of where some jokes might be. He’s willing to make fun of himself, especially when he’s in a ridiculous situation. He’s also liable to joke as a nervous habit. He won’t have other characters to bounce dialogue off of in Act I, but he may crack a joke to himself.

I’ll have to continue to work on understanding Christopher as I wrap up these last few chapter summaries. Ultimately, some of his personality will come out in the writing, but I’m a planner, and I’d love to understand as much as I can up-front, especially for this project.

Results

I finished summarizing the last two chapters in Act II. I spent some time working on (or at least worrying about) Christopher’s characterization.

How to Create Authentic Children’s Voices in Fiction–and Hold an Adult Reader’s Interest – by Gail Aldwin…

on Anne R. Allen: For writers who want to improve their practice in using children’s voices in their work, one of the best places to start is by …

How to Create Authentic Children’s Voices in Fiction–and Hold an Adult Reader’s Interest – by Gail Aldwin…

Drabbles

I recently went on a foray into Twitter-size microfiction, a story format so short that it’s challenging to even fit the basic elements of a story. It was a fun exercise in minimalism and editing down to the bare bones, and gave me something to do with a bunch of ideas that I had never found a home for. I wrote 21 of these little gems and I was rather pleased with myself.

Well, that was then, and this is now. I’ve really grown as a creator in the last…uh, month or so. My stories need to grow with me. I simply cannot be contained within the narrow confines of 280 characters. No, I need more.

I’m moving up, friends. Moving up to drabbles. “What are drabbles?” you ask. Drabbles are short stories of exactly 100 words. Yes, that’s an astonishing two or three times the length of an average tweet.

On the one hand, a drabble might be harder to write. In terms of pure labor, it has more words. On the other hand, one of the biggest challenges of microfiction is making a structurally sound, interesting story, within the size limit. So the extra space may make the editing that much easier. More likely, I’ll just be tempted to cram more into that luxurious extra space.

How to Drabble

I’ll admit, I haven’t read very many drabbles, so I thought I had better educate myself. There are some examples by well-known authors (and a bit of history) at meades.org. I also found the site Drablr, where authors have freely published thousands of drabbles. They have section on drabble history and suggestions on how to go about writing one (namely, write a short short story, then edit it until it’s exactly 100 words).

When it comes to Drabble construction advice, I think Connie J. Jasperson has the best take I’ve seen. She says to limit yourself to a setting, one or two characters, a conflict, and a resolution. No subplots, and minimal background. She also suggests a dedicating about 25 words to the opening, 50-60 for the middle, and the remainder for the conclusion (and resolution). Check out the whole post over on her blog.

More to Come

My first attempts at this format will probably be expanded versions of my microfiction. There were several that left a lot on the cutting room floor. I’d like to see if they benefit or suffer when given twice as much breathing room. I plan to write some “fresh” ones as well, to get the full experience of writing drabbles from scratch.

It’s worth mentioning a notable benefit to writing drabbles instead of tweet-sized microfiction: drabbles are more practical to sell to online and print magazines and journals. In fact, there are markets like The Martian magazine that only publish drabbles. If there are markets for tweet-stories, I haven’t seen them.

I’m guessing drabbles are going to be a bit harder to write than my microfiction stories, but I’ll have a follow-up post once I’ve finished a few, to describe the experience.

Reference Desk #11 —Writing Comics

I recently read two of Scott McCloud’s lauded books about comics: Understanding Comics and Making Comics. These books have been around for decades, but they hold up well. And when comics treatises are praised by the likes of Art Spiegelman, Jeff Smith, and Neil Gaiman, you can be pretty sure there’s something good in there.

I wouldn’t say I’m a full-on comics nerd, but I did work at a comics shop in high school, and I have a respectable number of comics on my bookshelf and e-reader. I know what I like and dislike. And while I occasionally dabble in visual arts like drawing and painting, I’m happy to be a semi-competent amateur when it comes to producing visuals. As a writer, I’m much more interested in the craft of writing for comics. That’s the perspective I brought to reading these books.

Understanding Comics

This book is, first and foremost, a comic. McCloud understands that the best way to describe the medium of comics is within the pages of a comic. He is an adept artist and writer, rendering his ideas clearly and gracefully, with a dash of silliness here and there.

McCloud has a style that appeals to my personal tastes — he loves to define and categorize. He describes the medium of comics by breaking it down into bite-sized pieces, then showing how those pieces can be combined to build new and interesting things.

First, he goes through pages of effort to justify his chosen definition of comics: “Sequential Art,” or more precisely, “Juxtaposed pictorial and other images in deliberate sequence, intended to convey information and/or to produce an aesthetic response in the viewer.” He gives a brief history of art that fits this description, from native Mesoamerican codices to the Bayeux Tapestry to Egyptian tomb paintings, and on into more modern examples. This may sound like dry academics, but it’s much more palatable in comic book form.

Next, he discusses iconography and the complex spectrum between words and pictures; how symbols can be more relatable than realism. He categorizes the ways that a reader infers movement across time and space between the juxtaposed images of a comic, in the “gutters.” He shows the ways that words and pictures can interact together to create unique effects within comics.

Finally, he finishes the book with a broad manifesto describing all art as a series of layers, with some art at the shallow surface level, and some digging deep into other layers. This ties into the comics stuff, but it’s more like his ideas of how to make great art.

McCloud is a great observer of comics. He describes many techniques that I’ve seen before, but his categorization and explanation allowed me to understand how they work, and what they’re good at. This book is not prescriptive, it’s descriptive: it’s a fantastic description of comics from his vantage point as an articulate insider.

Even though this book doesn’t describe comics in a “how to do it” manner, it’s incredibly useful for aspiring creators. It provides framework and language for understanding the medium. These are vital tools in the creator’s toolbox.

Besides, when it comes to creation, there’s a related book called…

Making Comics

Making Comics is another comic about comics. It takes many of the concepts from Understanding Comics and uses them as a foundation. This is much more of a how-to manual, split pretty evenly between visuals, words, and general storytelling principles.

Since my interest is in writing, not art, I skimmed some of the more technical parts related to drawing recognizable expressions and body language. I focused on the parts relating to writing, storytelling, and the way the words and pictures work together.

This book will be most useful to the indie comic artist, who wants to draw and write everything themselves, or perhaps writer-artist duos. McCloud does everything, so that’s the perspective he writes from.

There is a bit less in here for someone like me, who is only interested in the writing, despite it being a thicker volume than Understanding Comics. Still, Making Comics is a valuable book, worth reading if you’re interested in any aspect of comic creation. It solidifies some of the abstract concepts of the first book in more hands-on examples.

Am I an Expert Yet?

Reading these books didn’t make me want to immediately write a comic. But that’s a good thing. They do a great job showing how deep comics can go as an art form, and that’s a little intimidating. They showed me enough to realize I’d need to put in more effort before I think about starting a comics project.

I think my next step will be to re-read some of my favorite comics and analyze what makes them great. McCloud’s books have given me the tools to do that analysis. I know I like the stories, but how are they using the medium, the “juxtaposed images in sequence,” to tell those stories so effectively?

I also want to look for good examples of comics scripts, just to learn the ins and outs of formatting. I know there’s an annotated Neil Gaiman Sandman script in some edition or another of those books, and I’m sure there are other examples floating around. I get the impression that comics script format is a bit less rigid than TV and movie scripts.

As I continue to dig into writing for comics, I’ll come back and post more updates. If you have any interest, these two books are a great starting point. And if you’ve come across any other great resources for comics writing, let me know in the comments.

Character Motivation: Tips And Tricks — K.M. Allan

When it comes to crafting your characters, one important thing to include is motivation. It’s not just because motivation will get the story moving forward, but because it will also help you create well-rounded characters readers will relate to and become invested in. If that sounds like something you want to include in your book, […]

Character Motivation: Tips And Tricks — K.M. Allan

Kindle Vella is Now Live!

This is an interesting new market for serial fiction. It’s unfortunate (although not particularly surprising) that Amazon is demanding to be the sole distributor of any stories you put on the platform. That’s the main reason I’m not excited to start using it immediately.

It’ll be interesting to see if Amazon can leverage their existing writer and reader ecosystems to make headway against the existing services, especially companies from Asia, where short, serial fiction for mobile has been a thing for a while…

Originally posted on chrismcmullen: KINDLE VELLA Amazon just launched the new Kindle Vella. What is Vella? Stories that are told one episode at a …

Kindle Vella is Now Live!

Razor Mountain Development Journal #32

This is part of my ongoing series where I’m documenting the development of my serial novel, Razor Mountain. Be forewarned, there are spoilers ahead! You can start from the beginning here.

Last Time

I finished chapter summaries for 26, 27, and 28, as well as digging into God-Speaker’s “oracles” and their structural purposes in the story.

Chapter 29

Christopher awakes in his cell, on his bed. The lights are now dimmed. It’s warmer. The irritating noises are gone. He realizes that he has had a restful sleep, and savors the uncomfortable bed while trying to piece together what happened to him.

He vaguely remembers getting fed up and refusing to speak to Meadows any more. He delivered some sort of ultimatum, demanding to speak to Meadows’ superiors.

After some time, a woman in uniform arrives and enters his cell, bringing a chair to sit on. She shows some cool interest in his well-being, but he doesn’t trust her. She says that he has been deemed non-threatening, but that they still need to get as much information from him as they possibly can, and she has been tasked with doing it.

She takes him out of the cell and into Razor Mountain. They walk along streets lined with homes and businesses, all clearly inside caverns within the mountain. In some ways it seems like science fiction. In others, it all looks oddly outdated. He tries to ask about things, but she deflects, explaining that she has no authorization to tell him anything.

She leads him to a small but comfortable apartment, then sits him down and tells him that this is where he will probably live out the rest of his life. Then she asks him to explain everything to her all over again.

Cliffhangers:

  • Is he now trapped here forever?

Mysteries:

  • 29.1 – What is this city and who’s in charge here?

Episode Arc:

  • Despite being inhibited by days (weeks?) of torture, Christopher realizes that he has apparently stood up for himself, and it seems to have worked. However, his situation only seems to have improved incrementally. He’s still a prisoner of sorts. He wants to trust Gabby, but suspects that there’s some sort of “good cop, bad cop” going on here.

Notes:

  • I need to think about the layout of the parts of the Razor Mountain city that he sees.

Chapter 30

Christopher wraps up an interview session with Gabby, and they go on a little outing into the city. She asks him questions about what he’s told her, and she allows him to ask her a bit about the facilities (it’s not clear if she has gotten new orders or is exercising her own discretion).

He asks when the mountain was colonized. She gives the “party line” explanation – early in American history, but also notes that some people think the mountain was found this way, mysteriously, and construction dates much further back.

He asks what the people of Razor Mountain think the outside world is like. She relates the basics of the mythology that the mountain’s inhabitants have been indoctrinated with. He asks if anyone disbelieves, and she talks about recent and older mutinies. He asks her what she believes, and she demurs.

He asks if there’s any way for him to leave. She’s unequivocal that it’s very difficult to leave because of the clearances involved. The governance of Razor Mountain is outside normal constitutional constraints because of the supposed special secret amendments that have been made over the years.

She seems genuinely kind and curious, and Christopher wants to let his guard down, but he trusts nobody at this point. He feels jaded. She writes everything down in a little notebook.

Cliffhangers:

  • No.

Mysteries:

  • More of the same questions about Razor Mountain. It’s time to start resolving more mysteries than I’m adding.

Episode Arc:

  • Christopher senses an opportunity to start looking for ways out of this place. He also finds that he craves some kind of human contact, and he has to fight that because he distrusts Gabby.

Notes:

  • This is an opportunity to deliver some sneaky exposition about Razor Mountain from the inhabitant’s point of view.

Filling Plot Holes

I posted recently about the process of finding and filling plot holes, and I’ve been trying to preemptively do that in Razor Mountain as I go through the outline. As usual, I’m trying to get as many problems fixed in “pre-production” as I can, because I won’t have the opportunity to draft and revise when I’m releasing weekly episodes. I do really wonder if this will end up paying off in the long term…

One of the things I’ve done to mitigate plot holes is call out the mysteries set up in each chapter –– places where information is not available for characters and for the reader that would explain what’s going on. This ramps up the tension (hopefully), but I need to make sure they all get resolved.

For this project, since I’m outlining in detail and should have a good grasp of the plot before I start writing, my biggest risk is failing to properly explain something because I’m so used to it that I take it for granted. I’ve gone through the outline to look for plot points that I need to make sure I explain.

  • The people who disappear from the plane in the first chapter were supposed to be agents sent by Cain to bring Christopher to Razor Mountain, but they were planted by Reed, who wanted Christopher killed in a way that couldn’t be traced back to him.
  • The abandoned bunker by the lake and the burned bunker are the result of rebellions and breakdowns in the Razor Mountain hierarchy that have happened in God-Speaker’s absence. Patrols have been pulled back closer to the mountain.
  • The artifacts are revealed to be a crashed ship from beyond Earth. They contain many alien consciousnesses. The machinery of the ship provide certain powers to God-Speaker, and the consciousnesses provide a huge amount of knowledge. I’m inclined to be a little circumspect about this one.
  • Amaranth is responsible for most of the mysterious signs of life that Christopher encounters in the woods around the mountain.
  • The people of Razor Mountain have been fed a story that the city is a secret offshoot of the US military –– a backup in case of some apocalyptic event. They also believe that there is ongoing cold (and sometimes hot) war between US, Russia and China, so apocalypse is always a real possibility. Some residents have come to disbelieve parts of this narrative in the years since God-Speaker disappeared, including the exiles. People like Sgt. Meadows believe it fervently.

Results

I updated two more chapter summaries and looked for potential plot holes that might trip me up.

Writing: The RPG™

In the halcyon days of the mid-2000s, the exploding popularity of alternate reality games got a lot of Silicon Valley types excited about the power of games to motivate people. For a few years, investors were happy to throw money at any product that included the word “gamification.” A handful of useful or interesting products came out of that wave of gamification, like StackOverflow and the StackExchange network it spawned, but a lot of attempts at gamification just slapped points and badges on drudge work in the vain hope that people would suddenly love it. Those products all sucked, and mostly disappeared.

Still, the idea of gamification isn’t completely useless (probably). I’ve browsed the ARG scene in years past, strictly as a casual observer, not a front-line puzzle-solver. In the best cases, it’s an interesting vehicle for storytelling, and it can be pretty amazing how effective a small group of people are at solving a problem when they’re all having a good time and feel like a community. I read Jane McGonigal’s book, Reality is Broken, and while I didn’t exactly come away believing that gamification can fix all the world’s ills, I think it can sometimes be useful as a way to self-motivate.

So anyway, that’s why I sometimes think about treating real-life writing as a role-playing game.

Character Creation

Do you want to play Writing: The RPG™? You can! All you have to do is follow these easy steps that I’m making up on the spot. Get yourself a couple pieces of paper.

  1. Select a character name. This can be your real name, or a pen name, or the name of a friend who has a better name than you.
  2. Select a title. This should be something cool like Iron Pen, Word-o-mancer, or Page Slayer.
  3. Select your starting class. This is a general category of writing or writing-related stuff. Writer, Editor, Blogger, or Reader are all good classes.
  4. Select your starting sub-class. This is more specific than your class: Sci-Fi Writer, Short Story Writer, Fashion Blogger, etc.

Character Growth

Your character levels up by gaining experience points. You start at level 1. To gain a level, you need to get as many experience points as (your next level) x 2. So you need 4 XP to level up to level 2, and 6 XP to level up to level 3.

To gain experience, you have to  do stuff related to your classes.

  • A basic, unexceptional amount of work is worth 1 XP. This might be something like writing 1000 words or a short blog post.
  • Completing a task for the first time gets you a First Time Achievement, worth 2 XP. This is stuff like “First Thousand Words Written,” or “First Blog Post,” or “First Short Story.” You also get an achievement for the 10th time and the 100th time. After that, you’re an expert and you don’t get experience for doing that thing anymore.
  • Completing tasks that are very big or very difficult gets you an experience bonus: 5 XP or 10 XP, depending on how big and monumental you think it is. Finishing a novel or having your favorite author retweet you might fall into this category.

Writing: The RPG™ supports unlimited multi-classing. You can add as many new classes or sub-classes to your character as you want to. To add a class or sub-class, you have to complete a related task. You can’t get the Editor class until you’ve edited something. (Like really edited. Edit a chapter of your novel or something. Just fixing a couple sentences doesn’t count. This is serious business.) If you want the Blogger class, you need to post a blog post, and if you want to subclass into Fashion Blogger, that blog post better be about fashion, dangit.

What’s the Point?

There is none. It’s just a silly game. But maybe it’s a silly game that could actually motivate you to do something you kind of already wanted to do anyway? That’s what gamification is supposed to be good for, after all.

What do you think? Can we come up with more rules? I hearby release Writing: The RPG under a Creative Commons public domain license (no doubt giving up my chance to make millions from a half-assed afternoon blog post). Leave a comment with your additional rules, modifications, complaints, or erotic fanfic mash-ups down below.

Filling Plot Holes

As I’ve been working on the development of my serial novel, Razor Mountain, I’ve recently been thinking about plot holes. Razor Mountain is a “puzzle box” story driven by mysteries. While any story can fall victim to plot holes, this type of story is especially susceptible.

I’m doing a few things with Razor Mountain specifically to try to catch and fix plot holes, and I plan to talk about those in my usual development journals. Today, I want to talk more generally about plot holes — what they are, how to find them, and how to fix them.

Two Layers of Story

There are a million ways to dissect and study stories, but for now I want to look at two layers: the action layer and the motivation layer.

The action layer is the “what” of the story. What happens? Who does what? The motivation layer is the “why” of the story. Why do the characters behave the way they do? For a story to have depth, it needs both of these layers. For it to make sense to the reader, the motivation layer should drive the action layer. If the action isn’t being driven by the motivations of the characters, then the plot is either arbitrary, or the characters have little agency in their own story.

Both layers can have plot holes, but holes in the action layer look different from holes in the motivation layer.

What Exactly is a Plot Hole?

For my purposes, I’m defining plot holes as any time when story elements at a particular point don’t lead logically into the story elements that follow. The reader has to stop and say, “Wait, why did that happen?”

Holes appear in the action layer when something happens that shouldn’t be physically possible. If the butler was trapped in the cellar in chapter two, then how can he be serving tea to the duchess in chapter four as if nothing happened? Holes appear in the motivation layer when actions don’t make sense based on a character’s motives or personality. Lucy hates Rachel, and we’ve seen that Lucy only helps her close friends. Why would she step in and defend Rachel when their teacher accuses her of cheating?

Action layer holes are usually obvious once they’re pointed out. That thing that happened is impossible. Did the author forget a scene? Did they lose track of the order of events, or simply overlook that particular instance of cause and effect?

Motivation layer holes are less straightforward. Character motivations are more nebulous than the physical reality of the action layer. Just as it isn’t always easy to understand why real people do what they do (or even why we ourselves act in a certain way!), it’s not always easy to understand why characters take action. Often, as authors, we want to be circumspect and only gently imply a character’s motivations, instead of beating the reader over the head with precise, detailed explanations of why the character does what they do.

How Plot Holes Happen

It’s certainly possible to accidentally write a character doing something that goes against their personality or goals. Plot-focused writers can have this problem, if they’re more worried about the sequence of the plot and not paying enough attention to the motives of the characters driving that plot.

It’s also possible that we intend to make the character’s motivations drive the actions they take, but fail to make the relevant motivations clear enough to the reader. This is one of those challenges where there’s no right answer. Some readers may have no trouble following, while others are thoroughly confused. As an author, this kind of problem is very hard to catch without the help of critique partners or beta readers.

Exploratory writers (a.k.a. “pantsers”) may end up with plot holes due to the way they approach the writing process. If you don’t know the path that the story will take when you’re in the middle of writing it, it can be easy to include accidental incongruities. Usually, exploratory writers will have to look for these inconsistencies in the revision process, once they have a better idea of the shape of the story.

However, just because you’re a planner who follows an outline doesn’t mean you’re immune to plot holes. Outliners can get plot holes because they go into the story knowing a lot of it so well that they forget to adequately explain something to the reader. When you know all the back-story and exactly why each event leads to the next, it can be surprisingly easy to forget to include a vital piece of information that you simply take for granted.

Identifying Plot Holes

We’ve established that plot holes can happen to anyone, and they can happen in the action layer or the motivation layer of the story. So how can we find those plot holes in our own work and fix them?

As I mentioned before, mysteries are magnets for plot holes. You can think of a mystery as a purposeful, temporary plot hole. The author picks specific bits of information to withhold from the characters and the reader in order to create tension. It may be a mystery of what happened (in the action layer), or a mystery of why it happened (motivation layer).

For a mystery to be effective, the reader needs to trust that the author is doing this on purpose. A mystery that looks like a plot hole can bother the reader just as much as a real plot hole. As authors, we need to make it clear from the structure of the story that the mystery is supposed to be there, and understand that the reader will have the expectation of a payoff where that hole is filled in later.

To identify accidental action layer plot holes, it helps to look at places in the story where a lot of action is happening. If you have complex, interwoven plot lines, you’ll want to look closely at those areas of the story. It may help to make simple lists of events in sequence, or even a flowchart for complicated plots. A missing piece in the sequence is often much more obvious when laid out in this way. Does each event lead to the next in the sequence?

To identify motivation layer plot holes, you need to think about how character motives lead to character actions. Complex motivations make it easier for something illogical to slip past, so you might want to pay special attention to a character with several conflicting goals, or situations where multiple characters are at odds with one another, or have shifting allegiances and animosities.

Just as you can map out the sequences of action with lists and flow charts, you can map character goals and personality traits to the actions they take. If you can’t describe why a character would do that thing, you have a problem.

Finally, your last and best line of defense may be your readers. Critique partners or beta readers — really anyone can help find plot holes that you miss by virtue of being too close to the story. Ideally, you want readers who read a lot of your genre. Readers who prefer murder mysteries may have a slightly harder time catching inconsistencies in your politically charged sci-fi space opera. Still, the most important thing is to get extra pairs of eyes on your story to double-check your work.

Fix That Plot

Often, identifying a plot hole is the hardest part, and the actual fix just requires adjusting or adding a scene. A nasty action layer hole may require you to rethink how the events around it are laid out. A bad motivation hole may force you to change what a character does in the story, or change the character. You may find that you can add some backstory or personality trait earlier in the story so their actions make sense. Just try to make it feel organic. If done well, this can add depth to the character.

Instead of looking at it as just a fix for something broken, treat a plot hole as an opportunity to make the character or plot richer than it would have been. You can fill that hole with whatever you want, so you might as well fill it with something great.

Razor Mountain Development Journal #31

This is part of my ongoing series where I’m documenting the development of my serial novel, Razor Mountain. Be forewarned, there are spoilers ahead! You can start from the beginning here.

Last Time

I finished the outlines for chapters 23-25.

The Oracles in Chapter 25

There’s some information that I need to work into the conversations in chapter 25 that I neglected to note last time. I need to clarify the use of the artifacts to travel through time. This isn’t physical time travel. God-Speaker seems to be uniquely attuned to the artifacts, and is able to use them to transfer himself into another person. However, the artifacts also contain the power to send the user’s personality and thoughts into the past, to a particular moment. There, they can perform a similar trick, inhabiting the targeted person.

God-Speaker has found that children are generally a bit better at attuning and using the artifacts, but he is the only one that can use them to their full potential. However, he keeps a small group of children “trained” in their use. He calls them oracles, and it is their job to act as an emergency warning system for him.

When something catastrophic happens, God-Speaker can give one of these oracles a message, and send them back in time to inhabit his own mind and report this message. This gives God-Speaker the opportunity to do something to prevent the catastrophe. It also destroys these children. They last long enough to deliver their message, then become untethered from the host mind. God-Speaker doesn’t know what happens to them after that. They may be dead, or they may become roaming spirits, sent into purgatory from a future that no longer exists.

God-Speaker doesn’t entirely understand how this “soft” time travel works. Are there alternate universes? Does the old future disappear when changes are made to the past? There’s no way of knowing. All he knows is that he has received messages from his future self in this way, and those messages have allowed him to keep Razor Mountain secret. They have allowed him to quash potential rebellion and conspiracy against him. They have warned him of people in the outside world who are close to discovering Razor Mountain or his other secrets.

This is also how he initially learned that Sky-Watcher, his love in Chapter 25, has a degenerative disease that has no cure. Unfortunately, this doesn’t help him. The world lacks the advanced medical resources he would need to treat her, and there is no way for him to build up the necessary infrastructure quickly enough on his own.

He tries to teach her to use the artifacts to jump bodies permanently in the current time, but she lacks the capability. In the end, the artifacts do nothing. They give him a warning he cannot act on, and he has no choice but to watch in anguish as his love slowly dies.

This is important to build God-Speaker’s character, but it’s also a bit of Chekhov’s time machine. At the end of the book, this is the mechanism that Christopher will use to travel back in time to the moment when God-Speaker first entered the caverns under Razor Mountain. This is how Christopher will take control of God-Speaker at exactly the right moment to throw him off the edge and into a deep chasm, ending his machinations before he has a chance to even find the artifacts in the first place.

Chapter 26

The banging noise stops with no explanation, leaving Christopher’s heart pounding. An indeterminate amount of time passes. Christopher thinks whoever is holding him is doing this as a form of torture to wear him down. He waves to the camera near the ceiling, just outside his cell. He gets no response. He pretends to start falling asleep again, but nothing happens. Only when he really starts to doze does the noise wake him.

Shortly after, a uniformed soldier arrives and takes him out of the cell, cuffing him to the steel table in the central area of the jail room. More time passes.

Finally, a man in an officer’s uniform (Sgt. Chris Meadows) enters and sits across from him at the table. He says that they have a lot to discuss.

Cliffhangers:

  • What are they going to discuss? What are they planning to do to Christopher?

Mysteries:

  • 26.1 – Largely continuing the mysteries from chapter 23, 24, 25. What’s going on here, and what do they want with him?

Episode Arc:

  • Christopher is confused and alone, as he has been since the beginning of the book. Since he doesn’t know who’s holding him, he has no way to gauge what they’re likely to do to him. By the end of the chapter, he is fairly confident that they’re willing to hurt him, if they think it will be useful.

Chapter 27

Sergeant Chris Meadows introduces himself. He makes an un-funny joke about their shared first name. He states plainly that his judgment will decide what will happen to Christopher for the rest of his life. He could rot in a cage, or be set free. There could be other, worse options. Then he asks Christopher who he is, and how he arrived at the mountain.

Christopher gives an abridged, but honest version of events. Meadows asks about his life before being dumped in the Alaskan wilderness. Christopher talks about where he grew up, his parents and brother, and his job. Meadows asks about his interactions with the exiles. Christopher explains that he has no ties to them and holds no grudges against them. He was just looking for anyone he could find, in the hopes of getting back home.

Meadows seems dissatisfied. He has the soldier put Christopher back in the cell. Time passes. They continue blasting him with noise to prevent him from sleeping. He’s brought back out to talk to Meadows again. Meadows suggests that he tell the truth this time. Christopher tries to convince him that he is telling the truth. He asks Meadows what answers he wants. He suggests that if they’re honest with each other, maybe Christopher will know something useful. Meadows just tells him “I know more about you than you know. I know you’re lying, and until you tell me the truth, this will only get worse for you.”

Lack of sleep wears on Christopher. He begins having a hard time keeping events straight. He begins to wonder if he is lying. He’s uncertain when he’s only thinking, when he’s talking to himself (or the camera) and when he’s talking to Meadows. He seems to jump between sitting at the table and sitting in the cell. He thinks he’s forced to run in circles down the empty gray hallways. Then he finds himself jogging in place in his cell. He’s fed infrequently.

He talks about the time when he was young and nearly drowned. His older brother saved him, but was taken by the riptide and drowned in the process. He talks about his own guilt from that incident. After that, his parents never let him take any risks. He internalized their fear, and avoided any risks in his own life. He doesn’t know if he tells this to Meadows, or only thinks it to himself.

He hallucinates. He shrinks, getting smaller and smaller while the cell grows huge around him. His voice is too small to be heard. He screams and shouts, slamming his fists against the bars and the concrete floor until he sees blood. Then everything goes black.

Cliffhangers:

  • Is he dead? Has he lost his mind?

Mysteries:

  • 27.1 – What information is Meadows actually trying to get out of him? Who do they think he is?

Episode Arc:

  • This is Christopher’s lowest point so far. He has no control over his situation. It’s at this low point that he takes stock of himself, who he is, and what shaped him. He remembers this incident from his childhood that has shaped the rest of his life.

Notes:

  • This is the necessary breakdown that allows Christopher to understand himself and choose to change in upcoming chapters.

Chapter 28

God-Speaker sits in his modern office within Razor Mountain. He’s in an older body, feeling aches and pains. He knows that he’ll have to decide on a vessel and make the jump into a new body soon. Perhaps after he’s resolved the current situation? He feels a bit of nervousness, but reminds himself that he’s dealt with betrayal many times before.

He meets with Reed, a member of his inner circle. He explains that he believes Cain, another Razor Mountain official, may have plans to betray him. He asks Reed to keep an eye on him. Reed expresses skepticism, but accepts the duty and promises to keep God-Speaker updated on what he finds.

After Reed leaves the office, Cain comes in. The man is full of energy and has a plethora of ideas for improving Razor Mountain. God-Speaker pushes back, suggesting that they don’t have the resources to do all of this, and the plans haven’t been vetted by others. Cain is irritated. He asks God-Speaker pointedly about their resources and what his plans are for further construction. God-Speaker becomes irritated. He likes to keep some of this information from his lackeys to maintain his power. He suggests that Cain needs to work with the others to coordinate the governance of Razor Mountain. Cain complains that the other government secretaries lack ambition or vision.

God-Speaker reminds him who is in charge here. Cain leaves, glowering and annoyed. Again, God-Speaker feels a twinge of worry and a deep tiredness. He tells himself that a new, young body will help him feel better.

Cliffhangers: No.

Mysteries:

  • 28.1 – Does Cain intend to betray God-Speaker?
  • 28.2 – What will Reed find out?

Episode Arc:

  • God-Speaker is imperial and demanding of his underlings. He sees them as tools, and he’s annoyed that they don’t just do what he wants. He’s tired and bored of having to constantly manipulate and control people. His fear of death lurks just under the surface, still driving him.

Notes:

  • This is the penultimate chapter from God-Speaker’s perspective. His arc is pretty much complete. He is a shell of a human being. He feels his incredible age. He’s worn down. But his fear of death is too entrenched. This is what drives him.

Results

I finished chapter summaries for 26, 27, and 28, as well as digging into God-Speaker’s “oracles” and their structural purposes in the story.